This morning I went for a walk before my doctors appointment. The appointment was just a check up to see if all the scars are healing up nicely…which they are. My neck has some areas in which feels a little hard and stiff. This is normal during the healing phase. It is probably the last time I will see my doctor. She is leaving the hospital, because she wants more money and the hospital doesn’t want to give it to her. I guess I got everything done just in time, because I couldn’t be more happier about the results.

I got before pictures from her office of my body. I couldn’t believe what I used to look like. It made me feel kind of emotional. All of my life I felt disgust in myself. Looking at those pictures just made me remember how much I hated what I looked like and would do anything to look better. I guess thats why I am reaching my goals. Some people have to hit rock bottom to realize they are screwing up and when I was at my highest weight it hit me.

People say do not go into plastic surgery with high expectations….because you may be very disappointed. After I kept hearing this I had my doubts, because my case was pretty bad as compared to others. Losing over 225lbs at the time I had a lot of loose skin…way more than the normal plastic surgery patient.

After every surgery I felt amazing. The results are far better than I ever imagined….and the feeling is unbelievable. Even when I lost all the weight, I still felt like a prisoner in my own body. I was far better in health, but every time I looked in the mirror I just was in disgust. The funny thing is I wanted to first meet Kim after my surgeries, because I didn’t feel like I was good enough for her. I am very happy I chose to meet her before I had all of my surgeries, because I don’t know if things would be the same….and I don’t even wanna think about it. I wanted to see her so bad I didn’t care about my appearance anymore.

People ask me about my scars. They wonder if they will go away or if they bother me. To be honest, I didn’t worry at all about the scars. I’d rather have these scars than flabs of skin all over my body. If these scars fade, great…if they don’t I could care less. I never felt better in my life and I am proud of these scars.

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I seen Halloween 2 on Monday. It was the first movie I have ever seen by myself in theaters. It was actually nice and it helped pass the time.

Going into the movie, I didn’t have high expectations….at all. I really hated the first Halloween Rob Zombie did and I couldn’t imagine it being worse than that…but I was wrong. The only reason why I went to see the movie was because I am a diehard Halloween fan. The original Halloween was the first movie that I kind of obsessed over. I was only 5 years old. My brother had it taped on a blank tape and I literally watched the movie every day for a long time. I couldn’t get enough of the music, the suspense, the great acting, the horror. To this day I still have nightmares of Michael Myers and they still freak me out.

Anyways, this movie….

The acting was typical of a horror movie. Only the classic slasher horror movies have decent/good acting. The thing this movie lacked with the acting is you didn’t get to know any of the characters….not even Laurie. The actors were just there, they were boring. Dr. Loomis in the original was amazing, great and dramatic. In this movie he didn’t have no effect whatsoever. He could of not even be in the film and it wouldn’t of made a difference. Laurie (Myers sister)…half of the movie was dreams in her head, the other half was her screaming and the annoying camera shaking. You didn’t really care if she died or not….I was actually rooting for people to die in this movie.

Michael Myers is 9 feet tall in this movie. Rob Zombie turned a classic into a Rob Zombie music video. The kill scenes were pretty good, but there was no suspense! You knew exactly when Myers was going to kill. Myers MO is him lurking and you could see him in the background….not in this movie. There was no suspense or thrill to the murders. I only liked the gore.

Wow, I am not surprised Sherri Moon Zombie was in the movie. She played Myers mom but as a ghost in this one (wow, anything to be in the movie…..even though it made it SHITTY). Her and the stupid horse made this movie a joke. Rob Zombie claims this is his vision of the movie….his vision of Halloween…well I think he should get his head out of Sherri Moons ass before he creates another movie. I’m done with his garbage.

I heard there is going to be a Halloween 3D coming out next summer and Zombie isn’t going to do it. If this happens I will be fairly excited about it!

Wednesday

September 2, 2009

Its a beautiful day outside today. This morning I went for a nice walk and it felt great. My hands were actually a bit chilly. I have missed the fall and glad it is coming around soon. Yesterday I went off my diet. I just ate pretty much all day. It was all decent foods, just a lot of it. Kim and I did have pancakes for dinner which was awesome. I could eat pancakes everyday.

Tomorrow I see my doctor for a check up. Everything seems fine. She is going to let me know if I can start working out again…if so I will be hitting the gym tomorrow! I have really missed it and wish I could have been working out all this time I have been off…oh well. Getting back into shape is very hard at first. I imagine I will be sore as hell after the first workout. I will take it easy though so we will see.

Today I am going to the italian market in Philly to sell some of my dvds to this lady who runs a store in there. Its a shame how much I am going to get for them compared to how much I really paid. Ever since I found Amazon I have bought all my movies and cds there…..so cheap (even with the shipping).

Tuesday

September 1, 2009

My weekend in Atlantic City was good. Friday we drove up in the pouring rain….hate driving in the pouring rain. We got a free hotel in Harrah’s Casino for 2 nights from someone my aunt knows. The hotel was really nice. We hung out at the hotel for a little to have some drinks, then went down to the casino to gamble. We played roulette the whole time and we both were up at the end of the night (me 80, Kim I think near 200?).

Saturday we got up early, got some breakfast and relaxed a while in the hotel. We gambled a little and I lost all the money I won plus 50. I wasn’t too happy. How was red going to hit 7 times in a row….bullshit.

The Black Crowes put on a good show. I never really listened to them much, so I only know the old popular songs…and they really played a lot of newer songs to me. They still sounded really good and I was impressed.

I drank a good bit and didn’t eat the most healthy stuff….hopefully I still see a loss on Friday. I went for a long walk today…the weather is amazing.

Friday, 189.5lbs

August 28, 2009

Well I reached the 180s! My goal was 189lbs, but I am .5 shy of that….oh well. I am still pretty happy about the loss, because I have still been recovering from surgery. I’m not really exercising and I haven’t been eating great, just okay.

Today Kim and I are going to Atlantic City. I better enjoy it, because sometime next week is when I start working out again, and eating much better. I hope the weather is nice this weekend, but it doesn’t look like it. Maybe we will just hang in the hotel a little more 🙂

Thursday

August 27, 2009

This morning I got on the scale and I was at 191lbs. I need to lose 2 more lbs by tomorrow morning in order to reach my weekly goal. If I don’t I think I will be a little disappointed. All this laying around is getting to me more and more….I can’t wait to get back into the gym.

This morning Kim made me the usual egg sandwich and a mocha….I love her cooking. I try to help out when I can and always offer, but she seems to enjoy it. After she went to work I got a shower, went to the post office to hand in some movies from netflix, and went to Wawa for my diet iced tea. Wawa is the best store in the world.

Last night Kim and I watched the final episode of Season 3 of Dexter. It was really good like always. I can’t wait to watch Season 4. We also watched a horror movie called ‘Black Christmas’ (the original). I have seen this movie before but wanted Kim to see it. The movie is a little slow like most old horror movies, but I enjoy them. The movie freaks me out and gets me mad at the same time, because of the ending. I just wish it explained a little more at the end.

Tomorrow I am taking Kim to Atlantic City for the weekend. I got her tickets to see Black Crowes for her birthday. My aunt is setting us up with 2 free nights at Harrahs Casino….pretty damn excited about this trip. Even though I haven’t been working, I need a vacation from laying around this apartment. The weather isn’t supposed to be so great and if it isn’t we will have a good time anyways.

This weekend won’t be good for my diet I bet, but I’m really not going to worry about that….just as long as I keep on losing every week I will be happy.

Tonight is the debut of Michael Vick as a Philadelphia Eagle. It still is crazy that out of all teams who need a QB, the Eagles landed him. I’m pretty excited about the signing. I’m not a big fan about what he has done, but I can’t blame the Eagles for that. I think if Vick shows how sincere he is by helping out the community and whatever…he will be forgiven by many other people.

Tuesday

August 25, 2009

Today Kim woke me up at 5:30 in the morning asking if I wanted to go for a walk. At first I didn’t want to, but I used to love exercising really early in the morning. Before it got very cold last winter, I would go to the track at 4:00 am before work. The track didn’t have lights but you could see a little bit. It was just me and an old man who probably enjoy it ever since I started going. I would show up and as I passed him he would smile and say hello. I wonder if he is still going to the track at 4 am. Anyways, our walk was nice. It was about a 20-25 minute walk, with a pit stop to wawa for a paper and diet iced tea. During the walk I realized how much stuff Kim and I have in common. She is an amazing girlfriend, and my best friend.

I had an appointment today to take my drain out. All the drains are finally out! It was a great feeling getting the drain out, well…the yanking it out of my stomach was a very weird and sick sensation, but it was worth it. My doctor said I was healing very quickly and was very impressed with how I looked. Everything is still pretty swollen, including my neck which has been bothering me. I want instant results, but she said it takes a while for the final results to appear. I trust her with that, because everything else she did really made me happy. I asked her if I could have my before pictures that she has taken at her office. She is making me copies of them all so I can have just to view and keep my progress recorded. I’m going to start taking progress pictures every two weeks. I can start working out in a week which I am excited about. I’m going to be working out using the New Rules of Lifting.

She also gave me some bad news. I have to take another week off from work. There is no problem with me, it is just that my job is physical and she wants me to relax for another week. A part of me is happy to be off longer, but I think a bigger part of me is really bummed out. My days out of work aren’t too exciting. I just pick up around the apartment and think of as many errands as I can. I wish I could work out atleast, but oh well….gonna just try and enjoy the time I have off.

My doctor is also leaving the hospital she is currently at in the middle of October. This has got me really bummed out, because I just really trusted her after so much time I spent with bettering my life. The first time I seen her I was 290lbs and now I am 100lbs less, and I feel 100x better about my body. She is going to find a good doctor for me, but I know I will miss her. She is a nice lady and did great work on me. I’m glad I had my plastic surgery just in time for her to operate on me and have a few check ups.

I am really bummed out today about the news I received, and early I had a few shots of Jack Daniels. I know I shouldn’t have done it, and regret it, but it was only a couple shots. My girlfriend was going to take me out to cheer me up, but we kind of decided that it wouldn’t be good for our diets.

Monday

August 24, 2009

This is my last week off from work, I better enjoy it. Well I called the doctors office, because I was supposed to get my drain taken out. I am still losing too much fluid. Theres probably about 15-20ml of fluid coming out of my stomach per day, I know it doesn’t sound like much…but its better it comes out or may cause an infection.

I feel better, I feel fine actually. I don’t need anymore pain killers or tylenol. I may miss it, because it got me through so much boredom of having nothing to do all day. Today I cleaned the apartment a little, grilled up a bunch of chicken and turkey cutlets, went to the post office, went to wawa, and played a little Madden.

I gained almost all of the weight back over the weekend……I hate it. I still feel if I do great this week I will hit my goal (189lbs on Friday). I’m gonna do it.

I’m not looking forward to going back into work at all. I really don’t mind the work, I just hate the welcome back. I work for Boeing so its a big place and I know a lot of people. This means I will have all this people come up and ask 50 questions about the surgery, this and that, blah blah. Everyone gossips there. Everyone gossips in general. When I was out for my intestine issue there was a rumor going around that I was in a coma…pretty interesting finding that out.

Sunday

August 23, 2009

Today Kim and I played tennis. We played for just about 20 minutes and I called it quits. I felt really out of shape and just didn’t want to risk anything, because I had surgery 13 days ago and still have one drain left in me. It felt good to ease back into things and I am looking forward to doing more and more every day.

I have a fantasy football draft tonight. I’m pretty pumped up about it. To those who never played in one, it is easily addictive. Its online so it will be a lot faster than it was if it were in person. It cost 40 bucks to join and the top 2 places are paid at the end of the year…pretty fun. My other league is 100 bucks and that draft is on September, 8th.

To pass the time I am going to watch some Dexter with my baby and play some sudoku.

Saturday

August 22, 2009

7 beers, 1 shot of jack, and a sugar-free jagerbomb last night

It was the first drinking night I had since August, 8th. I was hoping to drink less than that, but its not as horrible as it could have been. Kim and I went to Chickie’s and Pete’s in South Philly. Its one of the best places to go. It was rated the 3rd best sports bar in the nation. We split a chicken tender sandwich with honey mustard and a big order of crab fries. It was a salt fest yesterday and it showed on the scale.

Kim and I got Season 3 of Dexter from Netflix. I was told a while ago to check out this show by my best friend, because I have a fascination with serial killers. I never gave it a chance until Kim ordered Season One off of Netflix. I was pretty hooked after the third episode. We spent the day at this farmers market called “Booth’s Corner”. It has a ton of different foods and basically an indoor flea market. We made cheese steaks tonight and now relaxing on the couch watching Dexter.